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Old Gaelic Kicks off Year with 7s Championship; 2023 Schedule Comes into Focus

Old Gaelic traveled to Cherry Hill, NJ and left the South Jersey Dragons’ home pitch with a championship trophy in hand. OG proved too much for the opposition, with a perfect 6-0 record in a dominant run toward the Cup. 

Kory Harris and MSM import “Eyyoo” Ayo proved too much for defenses with long tries throughout the day, with Amer returning to OG to dot a couple down for Mother Bosnia. A cadre of powerful and athletic forwards beat up the middle of the field to open up space, while Richard “Squirrel Master” Recordon put it all together with strong play at scrum half throughout the day. Congratulations to all who made the trip and braved the wind and cold throughout the day. 

After kicking the year off with the 7s Tournament win, it’s a good time to look at the 2023 pre and regular season schedules.

I know, a rugby player? Plan ahead??

Humor me:

Tuesday, 1/24 at 7 pm and Tuesdays after until regular season begins: Offseason workouts at Crossfit 717. 836 Market St. Lemoyne, PA
Thursday, 1/26: Townie Garage Tour
Thursday, February 16: Gettysburg Ghost Tour
Thursday, 3/2: (weather pending): First outdoor practice
Saturday, 3/4: Save the Date (early planning stages) Carlisle Pike Tour

Match Schedule:
3/11 at North Bay (Aberdeen, MD)
3/18 v. Roses
3/25 at Harrisburg
4/1 Rd 1 EPRU Semifinals (Home)
4/15 EPRU Finals (Neutral Site)
4/29-4/30 Atlantic Super Regional (TBD)

Citing Incoming Law Changes, Gould Announces A-Side Comeback

With the RFU’s announcement that any tackle above the waist will be a high tackle penalty, it’s only a matter of time that World Rugby follows suit and it’s the new standard in club rugby across the globe. While this caused much rabble rousing amongst the OG faithful, one Old Gaelic’s eyes sparkled with excitement. 

“If you are tackling above the waist, you learned wrong,” said Jerry Gould. “Tackling thighs is the gold standard in all sports. Baby, I’m back!”

When Old Gaelic *CV alums Jase Martin, Richard “Squirrel Recordon” and Alex Diegel offered retorts about different techniques and body types, Gould asked, “Who taught you how to tackle?” 

The trio looked at each other and responded in unison: “Dano.” 

“Figures,” said Gould. 

* Fellow CV alums Chris Armbrust, Brian Hart and Brady Reisman offered no such rebuttals, because they are short.

A live look at Jerry’s reaction to these photos:

No Offseason for Gaelic

It all started early on on Hoopsgiving Day,
Dante pulled out his bird but not in a manner not gay,
Next it was time to roll up our sleeves,
For its Lions Club season and time to sling Trees,
Then ‘Twas time for the party at the ol’ Caddyshack,
Where the Five Neat Guys gave plenty for the crowd to react,
Then it was off the Madre to continue the fun ,
We continued to drink even though we should have been done,
It was only a precursor to some social 7s fun,
On Paulie, on Weave, on Paulie Again,
It’s time to play Pagoda with a bunch of your friends,
Lee chip kicked for the try and said “listen, ya hear,”
Then in overtime Diegel found that elusive Fifth Gear,
Alas the Championship was not to follow the dub,
Yet we all know we play for the best brugby club,
So to all Gaelic we wish a Merry Christmas Night,
This Spring we continue the Championship Fight.

(Enjoy some photos below from our “off”season)

‘Twas The Week Before Christmas

(Inspired by a Dano Limerick)

‘Twas time for Christmas Carols to be heard near and far,
But due to foul weather, Gaelic was confined to the bar,
In through the door came two fellas, who wanted to fight,
They knew not how poorly that would impact their night,
I sprang from the bar to see what was the matter, 
There was spilling of beer and a glass had just shattered,  
Twas Jerry who’d been hit and knocked to the floor, 
Fear not, Russy came and dragged a perp to the door,
Chris gave him the word and he flung the boy through the border,
Diegel heard the ruckus and decreed an Executive Order,
For the fuccboi had made the acts of a fool,
It was time to toss him in a puddle deep as a pool,
And when that wasn’t enough and his friend came for a bout,
It was time to spar and knock the bigger one out,
But the pair wasn’t done they were looking for more,
Out came Weave, Porter and Hart through the door,
Alas, they decided, the duo was beat,
It’s time for more Friendship at Market Street,
So they closed all their tabs and off they went,
To Cheers their good friend, El Presidente. Frank Lentz,
As the club regaled in street justice done right,
They said Merry Christmas and to all a good night.

OG Closes Fall with Halloween Friendship

After a nap and a cigarette following a good fuck of Doylestown, Old Gaelic reconvened at Diegel Dungeon for Halloween Fun. Highlights included a bubble butt off between one of Freddy Mercury’s Fat Bottom Girls and Curtis, a special ventriloquism show by the Brillharts, a visit from Middle Earth and an undefeated Beer Pong run from Brady and… his partner.

Thanks to everyone who came out and to the Dettorres for hosting an adult-and-kid Trick or Treat last week.

You can check out the costumes from the digital season album here.

Old Gaelic Closes Fall Season with Road Win Over Rivals, Clinches Playoff Position

With late-season injuries mounting, Old Gaelic traveled without a full 23-man panel for the first time this season looking to avenge last season’s playoff loss to Doylestown.

A turnover on the opening kickoff put the hosts on the front foot, and the big Dtown 12 ran downhill on the opening possession. The center broke a few tackles and Doylestown struck first, proving it was down but not out this season.

Old Gaelic calmly regrouped and marched down the field with some sustained possession. OG brought a big center of its own and famed member of the “Dad Bod Squad” Josh “Jrobs” Robertson lunged through contact to score the visitors’ first try. A conversion from fly half Brady Reisman knotted up the game at 15.’

Doylestown struck back with a backline break, then it was the “rookie” veteran Paul Holmes who dotted down before halftime.

Old Gaelic seized the lead when speedy wing Alex Schaefer took a kick that missed touch back to paydirt to put the good guys on top. A penalty kick ten minutes later extended the visitors’ lead to eight… no six (said the Ma’am. Definitely still not salty about it).

Doylestown broke through the defense off a busted lineout play, then converted the try to go up one with 12 to play. However, Jrobs dialed up the ’06 Astro Van Jams and dished to his center mate Richard Recordon who sprinted past the competition and put the Gaelic back on top. Wing Kory Harris sprinted past the competition moments later to make the lead two possessions and seal the victory.

The home team wasn’t done yet, however as it recovered a loose kickoff and scored near the corner to close up the final score, 32-26.

The win wrapped up a 4-1 Fall for Old Gaelic and secured a spot in the playoffs. With a win over the Roses next Spring or a Roses win over Media this Saturday, OG secures the second seed and a home match for the EPRU Semifinals.

Be on the lookout for Thursday hangs, WINTER TOUR, Caroling in Carlisle, the Non-Denominational Holiday Extravaganza, team workouts, and Hoops/Touch Saturdays.

Old Gaelic Opens Fall Season with 58-5 Home Victory

A week after a preseason hitout vs. local Harrisburg and Shippensburg sides, Old Gaelic hosted South Jersey for its first league match of the season. Similar the week before, the hosts were able to move the ball well but saw early-season handling errors leaves some tries on the board.

However, after some calmer sustained play prop Sergio Acala punched in the game’s first score from the right-hand corner. He was followed by veteran lock Alex Diegel who picked after a strong OG attack and found some space off the fringe to beat the defense.

Rookie lock Pat Connolly then notched the next one off a Bronze following some sustained “Tres” play deep in South Jersey territory. Next up, an OG counter off of a South Jersey clearance found Acala, who took a whole three minutes (according to The Sir’s watch) to take the ball the final 60 meters for the emphatic half-ending try.

Old Gaelic put its stamp on the match early in the second half when, following an adjustment in the lineout to counter the visitors’ “sack” defense, Townsend alertly picked and went around the ruck for the hosts fifth try of the match. With a fresh crop of reserves , OG put the game away with tries from Schaefer, Acala’s third, another from Schaef, and a fancy pair of boots from reserve center Xavier Fangmeyer to pop a low pass up and finish a crafty break from center/fly half Josh Robertson.

Acala took home Man of the Match, playing a complete game on defense. Matthew Leggett deftly did the dirty work at the back, cleanly chasing SJ kicks and calmly countering, to take home the Viking Hard Hat Award.

Congratulations to Fangmeyer, Connolly, center Conor Kelly, hooker Chris Shissler, prop Mike DeFreitas, and lock JT Hammond for earning your first OG A-Side Caps.

Next up: It’s a rare double bye week due to a scheduling quirk, then a big away match versus Philly-Whitemarsh on October 8.

Backyard Brawl is Back: Old Gaelic Hosts Local Teams for Neighborhood Friendly

Old Gaelic kicked off the Fall season with a Round Robin of Friendlies vs. Harrisburg RFC and Shippensburg University.

Following the opening kickoff, the Harrisburg 10 chose to clear the ball deep where it landed in the waiting arms of fullback Richard “Squirrel” Recordon. The fullback patiently surveyed, made a break, then dished to wing Alex Schaefer, who dusted his opposite number with a nifty inside out move, broke a tackle (#SkinnyStrong) then fed back to Recordon for the early lead.

Old Gaelic proceeded to dominate possession and territory with a strong pack and steady lineouts putting the attack on the front foot, but some rusty hands saw a number of scoring opportunities go begging. Schaefer eventually broke through on the wing again, then Lock/Resident Angry Old Guy Alex Diegel ran through some Harrisburg defenders before handing off to flanker Porter Miller who finished the job and dotted down OG’s third score.

After the offense stalled for a stand again, defense turned to offense as Schaefer poached his opposite number, scampered around the fringe of the ruck and took the ball the rest of the way into the try zone.

In closing out the first 40-minute period of the day, Recordon (moved up to 9 and Captain now) chose to strategically go for a touch and maul… errr…. practice defending the 5M dropout. It proved to be a wise choice, as Schaefer proved lethal on the wing again, returning the kick for the team’s fourth and final try.

Shoutouts to flankers Miller and Jeremy Fisher as well as centers Conor Kelly and Xavier Fangmeyer for setting the tone with big hits defensively, and Recordon for providing steady leadership from a number of positions.

With that session over, OG handed Frank Lentz Memorial Pitch off to Harrisburg and Shippensburg, who was a little short and accepted some helpful Old Gaelic hands to round out the squad. In a back and forth affair, the Shipp side sealed the deal with a 24-12 win.

In the third and final session, Harrisburg, Old Gaelic and Shipp combined to play some… 10-12s. That match was sealed dramatically as Recordon tracked a breakaway Big Rigg, who nearly broke it all the way before being caught by the speedy Shippensburg fly half who hasn’t even begun to peak. The veteran guile and still-faster-than-most-athleticism was on display as Squirrel calmly picked after what could only have resembled a pileup of industrial farming vehicles, and put the game away to end a great day for Central PA Rugby.

Next up: Old Gaelic returns to Double D Ranch for its first league match of the season, 9/17 v. South Jersey.

Scandal at The Ranch: Hoops World Cup Tainted by Late Substitution

In a scandal so grievous Harvey Weinstein’s lawyers couldn’t defend it… a move so cold-blooded it made Tywin Lannister blush… an act more heinous than a Russ Kane CrapChat after a second helping of sauerkraut…

The beloved Hoops World Cup was covered in controversy as a late roster change sparked the *winning team to victory.

“I was simply doing my due diligence, confirming with Cappy that trophy engravings were indeed within the realms of this year’s Hoops Budget when two pieces of indisputable evidence came across my desk… the *Championship photo simply did not match up with the official roster that was posted earlier in the day,” explained club President Alex Diegel. “Clearly there was some sort of malfeasance afoot.”

“This goes past gamesmanship, and into completely new territory,” said Tournament Director Curtis Brillhart. “The damage to The Shield won’t soon be forgotten. We’re clearly going to need to look into some refreshed registration standards. I’ll look into what USA Rugby does for rosters and… ya know. Not do that.”

“I just wanted to play with my brother,” proclaimed an undeterred Jude Olivetti.

“Curtis woke me up at 3 p.m.(!) and I was there at 3:28 and I’m fat and old and I didn’t ask for a sub,” ranted Danny “The Ambassador” Reisman.

“Dinner was great,” chimed in Departed Teammate Ben Sykes, source of the controversy.

“Eat shit, Diegel,” added Russ Kane.

One thing that can’t be disputed is the self-proclaimed World’s Great Hoopster/World’s Fastest Gaelic/World’s Most Humble Gaelic Alex Schaefer didn’t come close to winning. Like at all. Suck it, Schaefer.