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Old Gaelic Loses Three Players for Season, Otherwise Match vs. Doylestown Went Great

Old Gaelic Rugby hosted Doylestown in its first home game in over a year. This was the first home game for many players, several of whom earned the first Old Gaelic “caps” of their respective careers.

After a promising start that saw Old Gaelic head to halftime up 21-19, veteran lock Russ Kane and rookie flanker Greg Armbrust were lost for the season with a ruptured achilles and broken ankle, respectively. Prop Adam Blood announced his retirement after the match, cutting short a valiant attempt at a comeback from a catastrophic knee injury. See you soon Blood, and we look forward to your third comeback attempt.

Kane remains optimistic. With his seventh orthopedic surgery, he has enough rewards cash to “get that jacket I’ve been eyeing for so long.”

Armbrust’s little brother Chris was a tad more miffed. After an ill-fated attempt at introducing his father to Hoops, this is the second major injury he’s brought upon the Armbrust family.

“My mom hates me now. Like, she’s not even passive aggressive about it anymore. Just aggressive,” he explained. Armbrust stared blankly off into the distance before continuing. “The word ‘abortion’ was used.”

In other news, if you missed Old Gaelic’s season opener versus Lehigh Valley, here’s the recap.

Next up hits the road versus Montgomery Bucks (formerly North Penn) before ending the season at home against Philly Whitemarsh and Lancaster.

Schedule for Frank Lentz Memorial Saturday Set

Old Gaelic has a full day of rugby and camaraderie set for May 22nd. Bring your boots and your beers as we remember our departed friend Frank Lentz on what is the Saturday closest to what would have been his 45th Birthday, celebrate 45 years of Old Gaelic brotherhood, and enjoy a full day of rugby.

Please note that due to limited parking, carpooling to the game is a must!

12 p.m. A-side Old Gaelic vs. Lancaster kickoff, 260 Willow Mill Park Rd. Mechanicsburg, PA.

2 p.m. Wild Rovers/Mixed B-side kickoff

2-5 Socials

5 p.m. Clear the farm and head to the practice field: 126 Hogestown Rd. (114) Mechanicsburg, PA

Please bring something to share. We will be providing pizzas at the field but will grill as the night goes on. A keg will also be provided but ya know… those things can kinda go fast with this group.

New Blood Powers Old Gaelic Past Lehigh Valley

Old Gaelic hit the road for its first match in over a year and came away with a 43-20 victory. Lehigh Valley looked much-improved compared to the last team OG played and came out on the front foot after a deep kickoff was mishandled by the visitors. However, the stout Gaelic defense escaped danger, and eventually the offense caught up.

Outside center Kory Harris notched the first points of the 2021 season with a penalty kick, then newcomers Riley Stone and Josh Robertson scored the game’s first two tries. With a Lehigh penalty kick splitting the Gaelic tries, the Good Guys hit the first break (the teams agreed to four 20s) up 17-3.

Jeremy Fisher then raced to a loose ball and scampered for the first of his two tries en route to a Man of the Match performance in his Old Gaelic debut. Harris also scored before wing Chris “Humble” Armbrust gave Gaelic a commanding lead.

Lehigh Valley played tough in tight quarters throughout the day and finished strong with a try in stoppage time to make the game’s final score 43-20.

Gaelic traveled a bit short handed but looks locked and loaded for its home debut versus Doylestown. Its veterans mixed well with newcomers to secure the win. We hope to see many in attendance at Double D Ranch on May 1st.

*Diegel is recanting this all from memory as Coach Roth had to put the boots on to provide cover at 9 and 10. Diegel doesn’t remember things too well these days, and may God have mercy on his soul.

Frank Lentz Memorial T-shirts Now Available

In Memory of our dearly departed friend and leader Frank Lentz. Available for purchase to Old Boys, family members, and any other interested parties for $20 to cover costs and make a small donation to the club. All current active players will receive them at practice with paid dues.Interested in a shirt? We will have them on 5/22 at our home game vs Lancaster Roses. If you can’t make that, please message Alex Diegel.

Old Gaelic Safety Coordinator Sommerville: Shedstaurant Health Violations on “Scale I’ve never seen.” 

Upon a review of the health and safety protocols of Old Gaelic’s beloved Shestaurant, Safety Coordinator Paul Sommerville stood horrified at the results.

“I’ve never seen such blatant violations, ” Sommerville said in between bites of a freshly-grilled long hawt. “Old Gaelic’s going to really have to bring things up to code. Or else, ya know,” he said before shaking his wallet before the club officers.

Sommerville was given a dollar off of his dues to keep his mouth shut. Allegedly.

Diegel Offers Meats in Recruitment Pitch to All Blacks’ Isaac Ross; Decision Pending

While interviewing new Austin Gilgronis’ and former New Zealand All Blacks’ lock Isaac Ross for his story in The Rugby Network, Old Gaelic President Alex Diegel made Ross an offer he… might… err… likely…. almost definitely will refuse.

“I know you’re under contract,” Diegel said. “And we can’t really pay you. But we can offer you a lot of grilled meats.”

“You can never turn down quality meats,” the 6’7″ Kiwi replied. “What an opportunity.”

Ross is under contract through 2022. But the window is cracked open just enough to slide a sausage through.

The previous story found in April’s edition of The Nose has been stricken from the record.

Snow Hoops a Hit Amidst Pandemic

As Old Gaelic players continue to look for ways to stay together safely amongst the pandemic, a snow-covered pitch was not enough to curtail a night of hoops and grilling at The Shed.

As players struggled to adapt to the conditions, Chris Armbrust finally notched the game’s first drop goal — only to be negated by Russ Kane! The weary combatants slugged on, with the team of Jude, Chris, and Davey taking the first victory of the night.

Team Russ, Diegel, and Jerry took Game Two in a true battle of attrition. Game Three took place at The Shed wear the worthy combatants ate hot meats and drank cold beers, making everyone a winner on this most frigid of events.

In lieu of the traditional “Winter Tour,” Old Gaelic has also gotten together for sledding and a night of bowling. As the calendar flips to March, weather should cooperate and get us out of hibernation and back to some rugby on the pitch.

Dates for Modified Spring Season Tentatively Set

While an official Spring season has been cancelled, the EPRU has authorized friendlies, pending the guidelines for activities as set by local jurisdictions. After surveying internal interest and attending a meeting of fellow EPRU D2 Men’s teams, it was determined Old Gaelic would participate in a season of Spring friendlies.

Spring practices will begin on Tuesday, March 15, giving players a full month to prepare before our first scheduled friendly on April 17.

Find below the first iteration of the Spring schedule. This is by no means set in stone, and subject to change. Of course, following the COVID data and protocols are essential to any of these games being seen through. The format of games are to be determined between the teams involved, and very well may include modifications such as no live scrums or lineouts.

Stay tuned in the coming weeks for further announcements:

April 17 @ Phoenixville-Whitehorse
April 24 Bye
May 1 vs. Doylestown
May 8 Open/Makeup Date
May 15 vs. Philly Whitemarsh
May 22 vs. Lancaster*

Please save May 22 on your calendars as a team day. This is the Saturday closest to what would have been Frank Lentz’ 45th Birthday and will likely double as our 45th Anniversary party. Details to come.

“If There’s No Crust, It’s a Bust” Great Chicken Pot Pie Debate Rages On, Threatens to Sink Old Gaelic

After 45 years of camaraderie and brotherhood, wins and losses, black eyes and busted noses, a vicious debate threatens to destroy Old Gaelic from the inside. The Great Chicken Pot Pie Debate has spilled from 2020 into 2021, and continues to spread like a malignant tumor. Crust or no crust? Pot pie or bott boi? Let’s take a closer look at this most vicious of arguments.

“If there’s no crust, it’s a bust,” Davey “Gravy” Young quipped, thinking this simple statement would bring the debate to a close once and for all. Good God, he could not have been more wrong.

“That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard, and if you ever say it around me, I’ll punch you in the face,” was the retort from a wounded Curtis Brillhart, firmly in the “crustless” camp. (Just like grandma used to make).

“If it’s not made in a pot, how can it be chicken POT pie,” added Russ Kane. “If there’s a crust and you put it in the oven, it’s just chicken pie. No more, no less.”

“The crust is what makes it a chicken pot PIE, you insolent fool,” retorted Brian Hart, one of the most ardent supporters of Team Crust.

And you see what brings us to these troublesome times today. While strong arguments were made from both sides and the debates raged on, Team Crustless was delivered a vicious blow that they may not ever be able to fully recover from. A recording of a google image search of “chicken pot pie” that displayed a page full of crusty results was shared, which left Team Crustless floored.


“Seeing that google image result… it was tough,” said an emotional Brillhart. “It really made me re-examine some things I thought I knew about my family history.”

Further research into the matter revealed that chicken pot pie, in its crustless form, is commonly referred to as “bott boi.” Traced as far back as the 17th century England, bott boi as we know it took a turn for the better when early Pennsylvania Dutch settlers added noodles to the dish, turning it from the bland, flavorless typically awful British meal to the delicious Pennsylvania staple you see before us today.

While the debate has cooled a bit, the bruised egos and wounded feelings will remain for a time.

“Traveling with 14 men. Near mergers with Harrisburg. Old Gaelic’s been through some bleak times, but I think this was as close as it got to breaking the team apart,” said Hart. “It was a close call. But we made it through. I think.”

“I guess the only thing to do is to get together, and enjoy our pot pies and bott bois together,” conceded Brillhart. “Except Davey. He’s not getting any of my bott boi. Fuck him.”


Status of the 2021 Spring Season

Given the ever-changing stats of the COVID-19 pandemic, it is impossible to predict what will come of the spring season. Even if the below does not happen, we can hope for some friendlies later in the spring. Old Gaelic leadership will update players and Old Boys as soon as any official word is made from the EPRU/MAC.

Here is the proposed schedule, as things stand as of January 28, 2021.

March 6 – Open

March 13 – Open

March 20 – @ Phoenixville Whitehorse

March 27 – @ Roses RFC (Susquehanna Cup)

April  3 – Easter / open

April 10 – vs Wilmington

April 17 – Make up / open

April 24 – East/West playoffs

May 1 – Quarterfinals

May 8 – Semifinals

May 15 – Championship